Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
I legitimately sent him a storybook of naked pictures.
It's 4PM and I'm finally awake.. I'm covered in dog fur and shame. I'd say it counts as a good night.
Shes been standing with her arms crossed in front of the mirror for 45 minutes...she told me she's "getting sober"
And apparently midway I said "hurry up and finish so we can talk about what a bad idea this was"
She set fire to my carpet trying to power-dry puke covered cigs with Josh's blowtorch. How she found it in the garage is beyond me but if you bring her with you again I'll shoot you myself.
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
He told me he loved me and then asked if we could have sex in the snow
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
OMG BTW REMEMBER HOW HE ORDERED PIZZA THAT ONE TIME WE HOOKED UP. APPARENTLY HE WAS HANDING IT OUT TO PEOPLE WHO LIVE IN MY BUILDING AS HE WAS LEAVING
Needless to say, she forgave him, they're back together, and I'm seriously considering having a lesbian year.
He's a loser but she says we just don't see the good stuff about him. It's like she's dating the Charlie Brown Christmas Tree.
It's ok, it's locked within patented Sealrite technology. That puke is staying fresh
She is 6 months pregnant and gets more action at bars than I do.
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
Randomize
