i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
he told me that if i wanted to smoke he could make a piece out of my shoe. were keeking this kid around
i called my mom using *69 and said this was the principal and Matt has a snow a day today. she believed me.
you kept shouting how the only tree you would hump is an elm tree because they're under populated
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He asked me If i had cheated on my boyfriend when I said no he said it's like he doesnt know me anymore
Let me make this really simple. We woke up this morning and fucked three times. When I got up and took a shower she cleaned up the mess from last night and did the dishes. Then we went out and she bought me brunch. I don't give a FUCK how much you don't like her.
If shame burned calories, I'll be back to my birth weight by the end of this weekend.
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
I actually took a sword out of your hands. You were samurai slashing lemons to make chasers.
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Hey, who is this? Sorry, you're in my phone as "you better remember".
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
Do you think they'll deliver pizza to my mouth
I'm over being sad. I'm now onto thinking about all the ways in which he is a total fuckwaste
Can I get my morals surgically removed?
Woke up this morning to him making out with me in his sleep, then I had to go on a scavenger hunt to find a used condom before my roommate got back... it was under my pillow.
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