Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
dude why did you let me call her?!
i told you it was a bad idea and to quote you exactly, you said "no, it's a good idea..that's what people do when they love each other." you met her 15 minutes prior to that conversation...
from now on when you get up to pee in the middle of the night, check to see if im sleeping in your parking lot.
i do.
i'm ready for this baby to gtfo so i can get coked out.
I took both his daughters virginities. There's no way he won't give me a job
But fine, we can play that game. You can come over and we can have totally platonic, long, boring discussions. Or we can fuck. Whatever.
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
I'm just gonna get real fat and join the circus.
I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
Well. Your father was, shall we say, privately surfing the Internet when he found a video of you and Kevin. This was on a very public website honey.
By the way, Kevin! OMG good catch honey!
Now in just stoned listening to my dads philosophical idea about public transit
I don't remember coming in last night, but apparently I ate a piece of pizza because when I woke up I had pizza crust stuck to the back of my thighs.
No seriously, I don't care if you just sucked God's dick. I have had a better Fat Tuesday than you
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
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