Is it normal to miss your booty call?
If that ambulance is off to save our dignity, please tell them it's too late...
Sarah Palin just quit. Happy Independence day!
God Bless America!
if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
He could list all of the presidents! Every one, and in order!! I was so impressed the least I could do was give him a blow job.
Ah, yes. Making our founding fathers proud.
This girl named her kid Rainforrest. If I die, just know it was from laughing so fucking hard.
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
She rolled over this morning and asked "did you refer to my vagina as splash mountain last night? "
I took a few sips of my hugeee bottle of liquid Vicodin and smoked my one hitter and now I'm going thru my attic like Indiana Jones
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
we watched a porno and made a drinking game out of it. best first date ever.
Please remind me tomorrow that I ate a loaf of jimmy johns bread on the toilet 5 mins ago
Does it get any better than dating a guy with a vasectomy? The answer is NO. No it does not
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
At least your wife cheated on you. Women will feel bad for you. In a month there will boy bands that are jealous of your dick
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