:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
i think the bruises are from the grocery store. on separate occasions. i've been spending a lot of time drunk at the market lately.
i have a vague recollection of being in the parking deck around 4 this morning, and on monday morning i was naked on the roof.
that would mean it's on tape
FYI don't ever, ever get a lap dance from a stripper who says " she's having a bad day " at a bachelor party.
I just fell off my chair and knocked over the table. People are staring. That hungover.
Your remote is drenched in lotion and you expect me to believe you weren't masturbating?!
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
Actually considered writing down one of the numbers on the bathroom stall. That's how much I miss vagina.
he just looked at me, said "i think i'll keep you around, you put the seat back up and everything," and then burst into tears.
All i really wanna do tonight is get drunk with you and dance on tables. is that too much to ask?
I just wanted to be nice to your dick and you are rhyming at me.
We christened the whole apartment and fucked on the balcony. It was amazing. I'm 100% sure downtown heard me climax. Now we can unpack.
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
For a second fuck I think last night went extremely well... our sexual relationship is progressing at a pace that im quite satisfied with.
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