We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
He poured syrup on all those broken dishes because "syrup is magical, and by the time we wake up, they'll be fixed."
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
What's a nice way of saying "You fell asleep, and I got bored, so I made out with your brother"?
You got cut off after you tried to make the dog funnel moscato.
Are we going out tonight?
My conscience says no but my vag says yes
I'm mentally preparing my vagina for this semester. It's fucking welcome week. I'm going to be talking to her all night.
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
Mr. Clingalot just ran from our apartment. What the hell?
I started to cry afterward and mumble random things. Examples: "God, please don't make me be so gay anymore" and "my mom is going to be so proud of me for fucking a dude this time." It was that or let him stay the night and cuddle. I mean, fuck that horrible shit I'm a girl that needs her space.
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
Do you think I could use my teacher of month Award to get free drinks?
is it sad that a disney movie is making me horny?
Can I come over?
Sorry I gave up dick for lent. Hit me up on Good Friday tho
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