last night was a success...if success means i don't remember the guy's name and my panties are somewhere in the parking lot behind the bar
His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
Flirting with the rich sleazy owner of the club: 1 way ticket to free sushi, drinks, and VIP passes. FUck! im better with older men than i am with babies and dogs
so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
yeah, it's no longer just 'day drinking' when it's 5pm and you're knocking over fruit displays at fresh market
the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears
I distinctly recall there being a "I can't be dead 2maro" stipulation to going out last night. There's been a breech of contract
I wish Samuel L. Jackson would narrate our bar crawls
PLEASE DON'T BE HEARTLESS COME AND GET ME FROM THE BAR I'M HIGH AS SHIT AND I LOST MY SHOES
Please tell me how I go from a guy with a coke problem to a cop. My own life doesn't even make sense to me anymore
Can I please come dance in my bra to destiny's child with you? I'll bring the wine and the glitter
Some girl dressed in nothing but Wonder Woman underwear and a cape on her ass just started twerking all over us. Remind me why I'd never been to a midnight of Rocky horror before?
Twist bend and done? Jesus that sounds like a seventh grade hand job.
I mean, we were all drinking, but I'm pretty sure kidnapping came up.
He just seemed to happy to be having sex with me that it ruined the mood for me. I just wanted to punch him.
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