love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
I swear to god Optimus Prime and Megatron are fighting in my head right now.
I just threw up on my dentist
So I'm banging this nun...
Isn't that how all good stories start? I like it already...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
what do 4 police cars, 1 ambulence, and 2 fire truycks have in common?.... My driveway
Is a Chipotle burrito an acceptable "sorry I ran over your cat" gift?
Her legal name is Candy. Her being a whore is implied.
He asked if I wanted to "hang out"
A verb which here means "do lines off my dick"
Can you send me a picture of you not naked, my mom wants to see what you look like
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you hook up with a kid and the next day he breaks up with his girlfriend, those can be seen as two completely unrelated incidents right?!
I think I'm the only sober person in the whole bar. If you count drinking less than 10 tequilas sober.
I'm 99% sure I just puked glitter. Wine drunk Mondays shouldn't be a thing.
No other way to put this but the dick was not worth him crying for an hour after. No more online hookups.
I'm pretty sure the guy on the dance floor with crutches just smacked me in the butt with one. Do you think he's flirting?
Is it sad or funny that I just bought two pregnancy test at the dollar store to give away to people on New Year's Eve while driving for Uber.
Randomize