Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
I'm half single.
Please tell me it's the bottom half.
i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
loyola was giving a tour this morning and they all saw me in a half ripped off toga throwing up over the side of the dorm stairs
you don't even go to loyola anymore
So I've come to the conclusion that I would cry if I had an ugly baby.
why is there a handicap sign in the bathtub and an exit sign in the kitchen?
lets deal with that after we figure out where i am
this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
Part of my whole not being a slut anymore involves not giving other peoples boyfriends blowjobs
Paying 5 grand for boobs is saving me like 10 grand in weed
I have no idea why I said that. I have no idea why anything happened last night, I broke my toaster making a egg. I'm going to quit drinking.
being pregnant is like rehab
Oh my god I found my bf's erotica
OH MY GOD HE WROTE THIS EROTICA.
OH MY GOD THIS IS GOOD EROTICA.
I can't believe I'm coordinating a threesome at work. My productivity is at an all time low.
Why are there four guys spooning on the living room floor?
They're still there? Shit. They were supposed to leave after they hugged it out.
I was totes going to lose it to him last night, but I cried and we ate mexican food instead.
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