Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
Then he told me I had the most beautiful looking vulva
Taking jello shots out of a big bowl from a measuring spoon. holla atcha boy.
... Already stepped in vomit and got a dirty look from a fat in a neck brace
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
somehow a sneeze triggered me puking over everyone in the car
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
I woke up with no pants, someone elses shirt, but my new years crown still on. That is dedication.
How was the birthday sex?
Shit got outta hand. Honestly I think even my STDs have STDs.
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Look on the bright side: Now that I'm sleeping with both the exs it's good bye to drunk sexting the 'wrong one'.
So his shoes are still here. And there are three contacts in a case. And a shirt on the bed. I've checked my dorm and he's not here. I'm so confused.
You will drink beer in a kiddie pool in your back yard but you wont bring a girl home
I can still be you friend and be there for you. And sometimes get drunk and fuck you.
Nice. I like it when Maker's Mark makes decisions for you.
I woke up next to a Big Mac box.. And had no sheets or clothes on. The night was a success I think.
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