He left the bathroom door open so i would hear him masturbate in the shower to make me feel guilty for not putting out but it just turned me on cause i like guys masturbating. weird?
My life is like a Sweet Valley High book but with lots of alcohol.
She said she could kiss it, just not put it in her mouth. Because that would be cheating..
a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
should we take a power nap before our cocaine gets here?
i am literally watching eva make a trashbag diaper for you to sleep in tonight. whole new level of low for you.
i don't know at this point bringing the fog horn might be a good idea...
my six pack is really starting to show since I started fucking everything that moves
Not sure if you're still doing the whole "sleeping with only one person" thing but if you're not we should sleep together when I get back in town tonight.
I'm crying and shaving my Bronco playoff beard
With a butt like mine I'll never have to pay for Netflix again.
Would you paint my ceiling for oral sex?
Whatever, ill dance on the bar at applebees, don't try and act like you're above it.
isnt it crazy how for years we were living our owns lives, and now only a wall seperates us?
stop. eating. my. shrooms.
my mom walked in on me eating her out, and i can never kiss my mother again.
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