I told my ex i loved him and then he sent me a picture of this girl laying on his bed.
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
guy in the car over is getting some terrible road head. he just gave me a thumbs down when he noticed i was watching.
I woke up and peed for 26 seconds this morning. 26 seconds!
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I'm done. I'm tired and there's a topless pic of me floating around the nation's largest 3G network.
and then we had to stop you from trying to pour shots through your nose with the neti pot.
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
I'm not entirely sure that the guy that just texted me is not on drugs right now. I'm also not entirely sure that he isn't about to be incarcerated.
Literally sitting on my bed in the dark trying not to throw up
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I think the lady at jack in the box started crying when we put in our order.
Now everytime I sit on a toilet I think about having sex with him. Great.
i wish i could put you in a lil box, and keep you for when i need to be blown
how do you tell someone, in the most complimentary way possible, that they would make an excellent stripper?
Just come here quick. I'm home in 3min. It will take you literally less than 5 to walk. Then 2 to undress, 16 to fuck, 2 to dress again and 5 to walk back..!!
exactly 16 eh??
Idk if I want to put a bra on
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