no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
another moral hangover. fuck.
They made my facebook status "I got my period!!!." Every guy I've had sex with at college liked it.
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
Just talked to the girl you brought home from the bar last night while she was looking for her panties. She said to tell you "nice try".
Thanks for the menagerie of condoms on my desk
It's the use of SAT words like that which make me want to use them on you
when i grow up i'm putting garbage disposals in all showers of my house so when you vomit in the shower its easy clean up
you wanted the guy to gift wrap the condoms
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
Are they engaged or just dating? Girlfriends come and go but the memory of sex at the pool last forever.
Change of plans I'm coming home and shotgunning all the beer we have.
While you were hooking up with her I pulled you off to make sure you knew what you were doing.
You said you were "testing the product for Chris."
I'm a bad man.
Please put me on a plane and hypontize me into forgetting the little bit of last night that I do remember.
How so I keep attracting the virgins? HOW?
You talk about your love for your ninja turtle onesie when you're drunk. Are you really surprised?
He just got home after serving 5 years in prison. And I think I may courtesy fuck him. Best Christmas present ever.
Randomize
