If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
He apologized for his naked psychotic episode and then we had goodbye sex on his sailboat
bark. im thoroughly looking forward to kegs and eggs. next weekend should be pancakes and pinnical, then cereal and seagrams and then whiskey and waffles.
The sun and I are not on speaking terms this morning
I found some video of you on my camera that's like 5 seconds long, where you announce that you should have been a dentist before taking a bong hit.
Doing 9 month old dishes in my bath tub. These dishes literally had enough time to gestate a human child
he just kept texting even after we lit his shoelaces on fire. he just calmly walked into the pool... still texting.
I think weed is turning my hair brown
Like you can't just be like oh bb and THEN SEND ME A FUCKING PICTURE OF MY 8TH GRADE FAT SELF IN A TACO COSTUME
We're at an agreement where I don't pry and she pretends blissful ignorance
Just had a threesome for the second time in my life. I don;t even enjoy threesomes. Too much effort.
HOW DO THESE THINGS KEEP HAPPENING TO YOU?
Listen, I just paid for a hotel room, so I didn't have to have sex in his car. I'm adulting successfully.
I'm definitely drunk. At the gyno. On my birthday. Life is a joooooooke
My EX’s roommate heard about the breakup and offered to help me bang it out. I think she hates her even more than I do.
Randomize
