there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
and ill be dreaming of you. not in a creepy way, but in an inappropriate way
It just hit me that I woke up to you in a bear suit. Explain.
we were fucking and all I could think about is how my silly bands were glowing in the dark.
Grandma just handed out bail money... it's officially christmas
I really just want to stuff him in my purse, take him home, feed him pudding or applesauce and brush his hair. That's not creepy, right?
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
I was doing drugs in the men's room so my employee went in to the woman's for the same reason but left proof and got caught. Had to fire him cuz I bogarted his dope spot. Awesome.
i'm sad to say... seems like women around here set up their armageddon booty calls ahead of time. wanna fill all these condoms with tequila and head downtown???
I AM OFFERING YOU ALCOHOL AND THE CHANCE TO LET ME SAY FUCK IT TO MY RESPONSIBILITIES. HOW MANY TIMES DOES THIS HAPPEN?!
He was so energetic. It was like screwing a bunny.
One less thong to worry about.
One less *thing! But probably that too.
I just want to bone him one last time before he moves across the country with his new (average looking) girl friend.
Who was that dick in the suit telling us to stop drinking?
The priest.
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