We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
he just fed my chickens on farmville...i guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex<3
When he left he said something to the effect of "well now that I've been used..." I think he may be on to me.
That reminds me of that one time you handcuffed me to a table leg while I was reaching for the vodka.
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
And anyway at least being paid in opium makes a cool story
The struggle bus crashed, rolled down a mountain, and went on fire, and I was on it ugh.
Currently watching Zombie Sharks while high. This is why I love Shark Week.
Long story short if you're going to get drunk on a sailboat at night leave your phone in the car.
I walked out ot my car in the morning thinking there was a sandwich I left there from yesterday. Then later that day I was checking the mail and saw the other side of my car :/
It concerns me the most that u were potentially going to eat a day old car sandwich.
I just wanted a bootycall and now somehow I'm at his parents playing dominoes. But they have tequila so it's cool
Please don't fuck the professor. We both know that won't end well.
You can have my vag. Its useless without you.
Thank you for stopping me from getting a butt tattoo. That was a good call.
Randomize