Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
Stuck in the Dallas airport. At the bar. Everytime a flight to DC gets cancelled, I'm takin a shot. Fuck you snow.
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
So, I had a dream last night that girls approached guys at the bar and said things like "i would like to pleasure you tonight." No drink buying, no sweet talking or ANYTHING.....it. was. awesome.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sometimes i wish my penis was detachable that way i could take it off sometimes so i wouldnt get into these situations
When I realized it was a dog, and I still had a boner, it was awkward.
look, i dont wanna be "that girl" but if someone offers me coke in exchange for sex, i cant say no.
i want to get drunk and sing the national anthem on your roof again please.
I had a dream that our used condom started talking to me. I told me that I did an amazing job, and told me that it saved me. From aids.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His thanks his mom for not having an abortion at his wedding toast. I love frat weddings.
One of the worst parts about living at my parents again is trying to hide how often I'm hungover, just quietly puked in the basement bathroom while my mom got ready for work
You sluts I'm so proud of you. You're both wearing underwear.
another side note: i'm officially selling my underwear on the internet
Angels sing when his face is between my thighs. I came 3 times before he even came up for air.
I honestly have no desire to wear clothes around you
I have that affect on people
Randomize