i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
It only happened twice. Once we used extra virgin olive oil and once I used saliva and brute force.
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
Just got roadhead while going 95. I came for a mile and a half.
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
He warned me he may piss the bed. I'm oddly okay with this.
let's get a trip to cabo together for next spring... they have to have forgotten about me by now
Today, my boyfriend informed me that I look like my dad when I orgasm
I just power smoked 3 bongs, ate hot cocoa mix before making hot cocoa, and realized James Spader's character on The Office reminds me of your mom.
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
Ryan friended me on LinkedIn and it took everything in my power not to endorse him for sexual dysfunction as a skill.
Holy shit, did you actually CHOOSE to get hit by the alcohol truck last night?
apparently when she asked me how drunk I was on a scale of 1-10, I answered "bitch I'm fabulous" and tried to do a sassy hairflip. but I have short hair.
idk i was trying to watch Fuller House and you got up out of a dead sleep, just in your boxers, said "no more Dave Coulier" and walked out to the living room and unplugged the router
When I told the bartender it was my 21st birthday, he looked at me all pissed and said "But you've been drinking here as 21 for the past 2 years.." How do you THINK the night went?
So I take it free shots were a no after that?
Randomize
