I have demons in me.
What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
i am making flyers for the homeless letting them know about free chipolte day
He's doing the 1:45AM lap: he goes around the bar, finds the hottest crying girl 15 minutes before close, and brings her home. I would feel bad for the girls if it wasn't such incredible genius.
What part of i'm handcuffed to an oven do you not understand?
I want to die. Marc and I were making out in the hallway and fell into a fire hose in a glass case. It shattered everywhere. Everyone thought we fell out a window. I think I have glass in my back. Awesome.
I'll probably regret it tomorrow. But right now, accepting this $2000 credit card so that I can finance booty calls from across the united states sounds like a golden idea.
I mean turning down birthday sex is never the answer
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
i think ive reached a prime reproductive point in my life or somethin- i see gingers and all i want to do is have their babies. like my body knows that i have a to carry on a legacy
Just got tinder matched with my COMM TA. Game on.
Woke up in a fanny pack with a bag of cocaine on my cheek
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
Randomize
