is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
You can't be mad at me for wanting to drink though, it is the reason we're engaged
You told the bartender you needed 2 beers, and a shot of his cum...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
today he pulled me aside to show me a lawn mower that he drew above his pubes. I saw his pubes in all their glory. Right there. In spanish class. Hola.
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
He just fingered me to the Lion King soundtrack. And when he left he turned dramatically and said "I'll be back after work. Be prepared." Taint ALL the childhood memories.
Swear to god you say cuddle bunny one more time and honest to god I will sacrifice a bunny on the hood of your car
He showed up at my door at 3 AM wearing a Santa hat with a tiara attached.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Was there a condom involved? Because he was saying he wanted a kid. Repeatedly.
He tried to stop traffic by waving his half eaten pizza at cars.... And we were stupid enough to cross .....??!!!
I'm watching the Brazzers version of Mary Poppins and enjoying it. Volume on and all. 45 minutes.
If you gave someone an std. would you say a muffin basket, a candy gram or an edible arrangement is a better choice to send them?
Do you remember last night?
Just that I fell down a hill with my penis out and the emt talked to me.
you blew the guy with all the harry potter paraphanelia didn't you
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