Drunk x Brooklyn = problems getting home. If I don't make it you can have my computer and my bitches. You're welcome.
He asked for his proof of insurance and he pulled out a Magnum by mistake. All of the sudden gignger was looking real good to me.
We saw a kid playing in poison ivy. We walked away, he'll learn his lesson.
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
found a ham sandwich in the elevator it tasted so hungry and it was still fresh. dont be mad at me. you know you love ham.
Is 10 pm too early to booty call a freshman?
We need to go to the store an get depends. I really don't want to be bothered with the bathroom this weekend.
They reenacted the scene from the lion king where mufasa talked to simba from the clouds. As high as they were they got it word for word. There has to be an award for that.
got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University
Good news! I don't have Hep C! Better news! I still hate you!
They invented a new game at work. Its called guess if I'm baked, hungover, drunk, or some combination of the three. Its surprisingly very difficult..
You were doing bacon vodka shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce. You're officially fucking disgusting. I love you.
Started out playing table tennis then ended up fucking him on the table. Happy cinco de mayo
You have cats and a ten year IUD. Embrace it.
Santa tracker drinking game, you in or what?
Randomize
