Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
phil was outside the bar last night, sitting on the ground playing songs on a guitar hero guitar to people walking by for money...best version of free bird ever
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
That's what you said about that spiderman stripper, but look how that turned out
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
my self respect just called, its having a good time without me
You basically told your boyfriend at the time you were going to shit in his hands.
And I meant every ounce of it.
Getting up is taking longer than anticipated. Alcoholic fish bowls have made getting out of bed a multitstep process.
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
Responsible roommate: 1. Someone who takes a huge shit at work so as not to clog the toilet at home.
In case you were wondering, yes I did just watch the Katy Perry movie alone on a Saturday night. I'm so alone it makes a noise.
your phone died, so you started bawling in the bar
yeah that sounds like me
I put purple lights under my bed and asked him if he wanted to fuck in a spaceship.
Yeah, so if you ever try to steal it, just know my tongue's been on it in several occasions. All over it.
Randomize
