we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
Should I feel badly because I just bought a really hot pregnant girl a drink after I lit her cigarette?
call me tomorrow and ask me about coke-whore stripper. It hasnt happened yet, but im sure it will be plenty disappointing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
it was my 21st birthday. took an old mans walker so i could stay till last call. reasonable right?
Dude its so hot it my room I can't jack off. Its gonna be a long summer.
I hope you realize, I'm counting on you as my wingman next semester. It's your turn to advertise another man's penis. I did my tour all freshman year.
I honestly can't remember your justification for putting peanut butter on your cell phone.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've been at work 30 min broke a paper towel holder a chair set a box on fire and fell down twice. Hungover Brian just reached a new level
So the first 4 hours of my morning was equivalent to seeing under water. Things were starting to get better until I remember I drank mustard for free stuff and flossed my teeth with a strand of hair from a stranger in the bathroom.
Also the girl beside me smells like she's been in a deep fryer.
That moment when I wear the same thing I did to a motel nooner to my family's Christmas party... Ho Hoety Ho bitches
I'm that daughter that had to send her mother "DON'T GET SHITFACED" & yes, in ALL CAPS.
My life is pants optional.
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