The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
naighbors jacking off again. i swear its his friday night ritual, its like he knows the night wont be ending in his favor
already putting money aside for 4/20. you ready for the greatest tuesday ever?
walking in back of a girl wearing booty shorts, a halter and a bracelet that says trainwreck. I don't get it. The first day of nice weather and all the whores come out, are they like hibernating bears or something?
sellin beer in gallon jugs is both the best and worst idea ever. Im only gonna have one beer...but its gonna be 128 ounces.
Between the plague n the counterfeit drugs we brought back from mexico I'm not thinking too highly of their country right now. Screw mexican homeless men.
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
I was tied up in bed before noon, the rest of the day can go to hell.
Woke up behind one of the fraternity brothers houses in the grass wearing a guinness hat and aviators hugging a 30 rack box with a zonie on my chest next to a campfire.
You woke up butt naked, peed yourself said something about jumbo shrimp, and passed back out 10 seconds ltr..
Her neighbors? They're nice. Young family. Tried not to get puke on their side of the lawn.
I'm sorry. I slept with him again. On the plus side he's got better at it!
I'm on my way to bail our sister out of jail with our mother's credit card. How old are we??
I hate when pubes grow back. My mons is a warzone.
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