gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
I wonder if you could grow some weed in a chia pet
you kept trying to convince me i had aids because my head hurt
They left shortly after you claimed the dirty rug as your mattress and began alternating between singing "Dayman" and "Nightman"
Feels weird sitting between two guys who've had their heads between my legs in a 24 hour span.
Finding out he was uncircumcised by feeling his foreskin in my mouth was NOT ideal. New rule. Lights ALWAYS on.
I just stuck my fingers down her throat so she could puke. I mean what are friends for
Oh my god she just threw up on her dog
I met this girl the other day and found out her boyfriend is a helicopter pilot. How the fuck do you compete with that.
The only way that night could have gotten any better would be if a unicorn would descend from the heavens with a nacho bell grande in a bag around its horn beat boxing Hakunah Matata.
There was a selfie of you in the dark pointing at the camera with a duck face. You sent it to my 60 year old mother with the caption "you behave"
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
"Where are you? Where are my keys? What is this guys name again? Why am I wearing two pairs of your pants?"
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
I just threw up on the way to class. Legit, on the sidewalk by psych building.
THAT WAS YOU? Psych prof just pointed out the window and said "that kids, is why you don't pregame before class"
Randomize
