carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
I really wish i had a penis so i could dick slap that bitch right now
i think you're the only person in the world who masturbates to food network.
you cried when she wouldn't let you have her bathroom rug.
Like I said I'm looking on the bright side. The bright side just happens to be filled with penis attached to hot marines
This bowl of cereal would be the size of a giant's bowl-piece. It's. that. big.
How much did you smoke??
They can be so fun, drunk bruises are like clues to the treasure of what actually happened last night. "why do I have a bruise on my belly button? oh right. i was trying to turn my stomach off so I would stop throwing up."
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
Drunk wound on my leg hast healed and neither has my dignity
My mom just asked if I've gotten any girls pregnant how is your day going
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
you're welcome to come here, except my beds from ikea so it's more unstable than i am
Hows your mom
Shes good, she claims she wasnt drunk
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
I just had to ask my drug dealer to "keep it simple for me". Is this a new low?
We've done worse things
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