he started yelling "squirt for me" then his girlfriend knocked on the door and told us to keep it down
i'm not really understanding how she couldn't figure out it was him
Turns out, Windex will cut right through semen stains on a computer case.
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
I imagine anything that isn't a dilldo attached to a jackhammer, powered by a generator won't be amazing enough for you
He also has a monumental penis. It's unbelieveable. I'm sorry but he's perfect.
Friends dont let friends get hit with a flaming baton without warning
I told them I got hit by a car again and now im pretty sure they think im being abused but there was no way in hell the truth was going to fly. Employed people aren't supposed to break their faces in piggy back ride accidents.
Responsibility: Hiding your beer when your DWI clients who are out on bond come to talk to you at bars.
it wasn't sex so much as.....a disastrously uncomfortable sexual experience
Cause its not a drunken adventure unless someone ends up in a pool
new costume idea. paint swatches and a ball gag... I'll be 50 shades of grey.
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
my mom just came into my room and handed me a news paper article about women on the verge of a drinking problem... i can already tell its not about to be sunday funday
ill drive you to the airport today if we can have sex first
i left yesterday
ill pick you up from the airport on sunday if we can have sex after
Randomize
