im gay
i know
yea but for you.
When my kids ask how I lost my virginity Im going to have to tell them of a mythical thing called "Myspace" and how strangers could lure you into their "den of love" thanks to clever quotes and graphics
elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
once my pubes got caught on her snaggletooth it was all downhill from there
This girl just stopped in the middle of a sentence because of my blue eyes. She said she got lost in them. I am laying pipe tonight.
He took out the lube and started calling it fuck fluid
Edward fifth and chaser hands
Can we promise no matter what that we have sex the night the Mayan calendar runs out?
Some lady old enough to be our mom took us home, made me eggs and he still got some. Where do I claim my best wingman/sister trophy?
This is not 2004 anymore. It's not acceptable to get fingered while watching 'Ferngully' in a basement full of your friends.
My now ex hook up buddy realized I was hooking up with others when she saw my spotify sex playlist making appearances on fb. fml
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
Like seriously how stupid drunk do you have to get befor you start finding dolphin lighters and shit in your undergarments
Randomize
