Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
apparently smacking a customer in the face with his iPhone was not part of the WOW factor we learned in training...
Pretty sure I just slept with Elmo.
Im beginning to think that if I ever write an autobiography it will have to be mostly fill in the blank.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
Night is still young. Puking guts out part of it just began
I'm offering you baseball tickets and my vagina, isn't that enough?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
I walked by the two of them and mouthed "fuck me" based on there reaction I think they just came in their pants
He stopped his car in the middle of ongoing traffic to ask me to marry him. Then he got pulled over. Yeah I'd say the slutty Dallas Cowboys costume was a success.
Your hotness may or may not have landed him in jail.
They are going to name an STD after you.
Put a Santa hat on my junk. He's wants to be festive too.
so... i have a picture of you and three other girls making kissy faces at this giant stuffed banana you're holding. however, you seem to be violently screaming at it.
Those bitches did NOT have my back.
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