I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
i just defriended some girl because according to her status she "doesn't give a fuck about shark week."
you announced to everyone at the bar "fuck girls. they're confusing. im gonna start having sex with boys now"
Alone. In an inflatable pool. Drinking vodka and raspberry lemonade. I don't need approval as much as I need to know you love me still.
if u cant get laid at this wedding we need to have a looooooong talk about the possibility of u becoming a lesbian
searching "dave" under the university of pittsburgh on facebook was not exactly how i hoped to find my baby daddy
Bright side: maybe hell start being nice to you now that you know he has erectile dysfunction.
I'm bored enough im considering taking up his offer to turn me straight just to kill time until the lasagna is out of the oven
Definitely thought about throwing up in the cat box since it's not as far to the bathroom..
My dad told me I would need to be my mom's DD tonight. So, that's how my Easter weekend is going down.
In the middle of pounding my asshole he stopped and said, "do you want to get breakfast after this?"
I cant believe you made me read bad furry sexts
Valentine's Day is now to be known as Tacos and Orgasms Day.
I got up and left his place at 3am because I remembered I had a burrito in my car.
Randomize
