did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
There was a gorilla playing an accordion outside of my last final. I miss college already.
There is nothing wrong with wanting a slide attached to your staircase
Remember the time we were horrifically hung over, went to mcdonalds, an you merely felt the weight of the mcnuggets box and knew there was an extra?
like it was yesterday
lit a joint with my parents wedding matches today, this is what happens when you're out of lighter fluid. didnt even feel guilty.
I'm going as either a recovering alcoholic, or as a guy who came to the party straight from work. Too literal?
Don't ever feel guilty about what you put in your mouth best advice my gma ever gave me lmao
Lying naked in bed eating carrot cake of off my bare breasts while watching Family Guy. Tonsilitis isn't all bad!
There something liberating about walking through the dorm hallways without pants on.
I should not be allowed to reproduce. The world doesn't need my sarcastic asshole demon spawn in child form
Alright I'd bang a 4 sober, It's been like 3-4 weeks or how ever long 4th of July was ago. I wanna fuck something.
4th of July was 12 days ago. The date is literally in the text you just sent.
I don't care about the dates I just wanna bone something.
HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT
So I just ran in to the Couger you saw me take home last month who i haven't talked to since then at Wawa and she was PISSED.. APPARENTLY i fucked her niece last week
Soooooooo high. David tried to rinse the water droplets out of the sink for 5 minutes
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
Randomize
