Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
Who's got a bloodstream full of margaritas by 2pm? Not you, that's for sure, because you've got one of those "real" jobs.
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
Just found a pic on my phone of you on squatting on the hood of a police car about to take a dump. Care to explain what happened last night?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Remember camping when you drank 36 beers to yourself in one day and puked in your tent? Ready for round 2?
if i ever get hit by a car or something and become paralyzed promise me youll still be here to hand feed me shots and light my bowls please
I woke up naked except for someone else's socks. Im so proud
I found his belly button lint in my hair. Can't say it was worth it.
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
And then the templeton police were like "oh I remember her, yeah the blue haired girl that we picked up cause she was passed out drunk on the side of the road"
I told him he could fuck me in his Notre Dame jersey if they won and he never texted back. What is this world coming to
Its official... I need to stop being so slutty.. the guy I had sex with on friday delivered my jimmy johns tonight.
we turned the lights off and all you could see were my glow in the dark stars and his penis
I promised her I would shit on your driveway. There's nothing that you or I can do about it now.
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