Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
You watched "From Justin to Kelly" and sang along to more than half of the songs. I didn't know whether to laugh or to be insanely frightened that you knew almost all the lyrics.
I know its only noon but, Im too drunk to hold this baby...
He told me he was 'pondering the natural wonder that is my ass'
Like, dude. I'm already fucking you, you don't need to wax poetic.
Isn't he wasted enough that he might actually mean it and not just be trying to get you to fuck him without a condom?
Someone wrote Kyle's bitch on me too. I dont even know who Kyle is.
If she asks the cat was vomiting before I fed it fried calamari
Hey.. Here's a thought for the evening. There's only two more sleeps until I fuck you so hard my back teeth will convulse.. Here's too Tuesday! Woohooooo
idk about you, but when i sext i just hit em with the "yo lets bang" text
I think I almost ran over some kid I went to high school with. Guilt factor: moderate to low.
Smoked a joint with mom, best Thanksgiving ever!
And a hot pocket after we fucked. Heaven.
He knocked me over backwards in my chair. I had a beer in each hand. Didn't spill a drop.
I wanna get to the point where I can just send a question mark and get an exclamation point in response
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
Randomize
