New boss looks like john cusack in a collar. Hot. Why do i always want to have sex with priests?
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
Apparently, I woke him up at 4AM, and yelled "you're mad because we don't have sex," while grabbing his dick. Then immediately fell back asleep, dick in hand.
Sorry I fell asleep again. I'm in the shower now. Door is unlocked. Condoms are in my desk. I want your game face on for when I get out.
they esentially rejected my mermaid threesome offer:(
Every time I roll over in bed I land on a different vibrator. I feel I'm the only one with this problem.
What do you mean you don't want me to steal the manikin do you have any idea how expensive inflatable dolls are I can't get that for your birthday
I also got a mission for you and you're gonna love it. Biggest. Hospital. Party. Ever.
Someone younger than me just got married. Send help and vodka
I was chasing pulls of fireball with bites of a bagel and yelling at people to take tequila shots with me. I shouldn't be allowed to go out alone.
I showed my cat the amount of coke I had. She looked concerned.
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
I feel like you're the sexual bearcat I've always wanted to be.
I sent him a topless photo and he complimented my eyes. I'm not sure if I'm offended or pleasantly surprised.
Randomize
