Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
Guess who's still drunk but on time to court to represent a DUI?
You are my hero
duuuude. vodka popsicles DO NOT function.
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
There's a girl at 7-11 apologizing for her behavior and asking if she can get her shoes back.
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
they just started filling water ballons with vodka.
on my way.
Pretty sure I humiliated the fuck out of myself last night after I was dared to attempt to give myself head. I hate vodka
Who was the girl that woke me up at 4am to tell me "there's an emergency, we need you to come smoke weed"
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
He gets married Father's Day weekend and I just found out I'm pregnant. What do I do?
I legit just quacked out loud at a duck on campus. Realized after that there were people around me, they looked at me funny...
You really need to stop getting injured so often it's really starting to negatively impact my sex life. Oh and get well soon. . . no seriously though hurry the fuck up.
Randomize
