I just had to explain to my father, how having two screens plugged into my computer doesn't use more internet.
I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
Somehow ended up at a stranger's bridal shower. Everyone else is already drunk.
I still don't understand how I went from crying to blowing you in like two minutes.
the whole "pretend to be sober/pull it together for my family" thing really blew up in my face when i threw up into my pillowcase.
One is full of apple juice. One is full of tequila. This is real russian roulette my friend.
please tell me you're in jail and for some reason they have wifi
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
Lets play hurricane shelter. And the shelter is my bed, and we forgot our clothes.
It was 16 hours of liver killing mistake making goodness
I can now say I know getting hit in the face with a flying tortilla is not fun
Point in my hangover when I'm honestly not sure if I'm about to puke, or shit my pants.
Randomize
