im gay
i know
yea but for you.
dude, i just saw a bobcat while i was rollerblading this morning
1 dont ever text someone @ 8am on sat. 2 dont ever admit to rollerblading past 1992.
You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
I started making my dollar bills into rings for the strippers
Ask her if said friend is decent looking or a wildabeast. Need to know if I need to top these 8 coronas off with a little tequila.
We finally have the house to ourselves and your out playing Lance Fucking Armstrong
The girls danced. I drank. Then I danced cause I was drunk. Then I ripped tim's shirt off cause I'm awesome.
Just cleaned someone else's sperm off of my bedroom wall. Never throwing a house party again.
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
After we had sex he told me it was a "goodbye gift". We haven't talked since.
Packing for college has become a game of where did I hide my sex toys.
I hooked up with a guy named Quan.. I literally hit the Quan
Tell him that his phone is taped to the dog's stomach. Stop trying to call it because it makes him scared.
Randomize
