oddly enough my penis is pretty tan. the part of my body that gets the least amount of sunlight is tanner than most of the rest of my body.
I think its part of male evolution. Pretty soon they'll have diamonds on them and taste like chocolate.
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
He would stand there for a few seconds with a blank look on his face then randomly start running full sprint towards macdonalds. We'd catch him and he'd promise to stop so we'd let him go and he'd do it again.
I know what youre going to say and vodka only explains half of my sitation
Not sure if he was actually hot or hot in a "he brought a live chicken to the party" kinda way but I got his # regardless
Believe me. As soon as the boss man is out the door. I am on my way to wow your vagina with my horse-like attributes.
he has decreed that i can sleep with anyone who has the same name as him. line up all the toms
Dude it's huge. I don't usually like looking at those things, but you're kind of forced to stare that horse in the face.
FYI: Brian said he left me in the bathroom Friday night to shower and 45 minutes later found me with a towel around my head, my pants on and holding my boobs. No more Jell-O shots for me.
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
Do you ever look at someone's Snapchat story and think ‘you told me you would eat my ass’?
I didn't see her "bad karma" tattoo until after I was balls deep
I feel like I put a fire out with my hand but idk if that was a dream or not
How did you end up breaking into that laundromat at 3am? I saw the snapchat but like..... How?
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
Randomize