he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
well my last 2 orgasms were over shoe sales at macy's. what does that tell you?
so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
I always figured rock bottom would've involved more hookers
I pretty much envision me eating a turkey leg whilst fucking you. I have priorities.
she just announce I'm david copper field and tried to shove a napkin down my throat
I can't straight up say the only reason I smoked a couple bowls with you was for your three legged cat
Oh it's not a problem. Cleaning up the yard and disposing of 75 gallons of Jello is all I've got to look forward to today.
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
i love how you just walk into that dealer's house every time without knocking, yet you don't even know his name
I manage to fit my wine bottle in my koozie and the rest is history
If I could figure out how to do him with his wranglers on you would never see me again.
He shit in the fireplace
(440): please tell me you didn't have sex in my dress.. IT'S A VIRGIN DRESS.
i wish i could put you in a lil box, and keep you for when i need to be blown
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