so my bro's bff came over...we had an awkward "yeah we fucked and can fuck later, but let's just pretend it didn't happen in front of the family" hug.
I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
Last night started off great but became the saddest day of my life when i was drunk in a hotel room eating day old mac and cheese out of a yatzee cup with a coffee lid as a spoon...
Okay, thats embarrasing even by my standards and I've thrown up while wearing a viking hat. just a viking hat.
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your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
He had a ladies night special at his place. Unlimited jello shots till 10, 50 cents after.
we all took turns holding you up and pretending that you were simba and that we were presenting you to the jungle
She wanted to roleplay. Apparently you be snow and i'll be a plow wasn't an option
Excellent idea. Nothing says "congrats for resurrecting yourself, Jesus" like Greygoose at noon!
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YOU CAN'T JUST DO COKE AND THEN CALM DOWN
Got stoned and went to Walmart. For some reason a preacher walked up and asked if I knew the lord so I just yelled "I CAN FEEL HIM IN MY VIENS" at the top of my lungs. he left after that.
I'm wearing sunglasses around my house. Douchebag status. The hangover is real.
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
I give all credit to my lucky thong, there's never a time I haven't gotten laid while wearing it
I told ya. I'm super awesome at making things super awkward. I'm the Awkwardnator.
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