Well all I remember is going to sleep being big spoon to you and waking up being little spoon to *****
no sex. but he left me weed, so almost as good.
He told us that was the only place he could get service when we found him in the closet passed out with a beer
So I'm up to masturbating three times a day, drunk textin my ex, not doing any hw and I've failed half of my tests so far
Sounds better than last semester
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
He confessed to putting dry erase marker dots on my vibrator to keep track of when I "electronically cheated" and then passed out.
I will fight anything that is not spinning right now
thank you for letting me use your house as a brothel.
I was woken up in my old house by the new residents ... I don't even have a Key anymore
I feel like if anyone knew what an affection erection looked like it would be you
Can you rollerblade?
No, why?
Honestly, I was high and picturing us roller blading together. I wanted to see if I could make my dreams a reality.
SOMEONE WITH THE TWITTER HANDLE "METHLAB" FAVORITED THAT PICTURE
The highlight of the trip was definitely my dad telling me that I "used to be his prettiest daughter."
I’M PUT OFF FROM FOOD RN BC EARLIER I GOT SOME WATER AND I WAS 4 SIPS IN WHEN I NOticed A FUCKING BURGER KING F R Y IN MY D R I N K
Being single again makes you realize how guys can go from licking your asshole one night to never texting you again
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