I am not drunk. I will recite the pledge.
I don't want you to recite the pledge!
Pledge alligien to america to united states of america
forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
There's a fat drunk walrus bitch here next to me and shes already puked and now falling on herself
OH FUCK NOW HER BOYFRIEND IS MAKING OUT WITH HER VOMIT HOLE
Sounds like a good blink 182 concert...
I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
5 am is for sleeping. Or getting railed on by a stranger. But never for fundraising. Get real.
Before you ask, yes. Whatever you're wearing IS too slutty for his mom's funeral.
I got groped on the dancefloor by both grooms. I love gay weddings
Just puked up hair, tacos and vodka. Hello Memorial Day weekend.
if I could send you my dick right now I would. that's how good of a friend I am.
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
I'm watching intervention which is getting me psyched for your birthday. Is that wrong?
My idiot ex texted me on Valentine's day to tell me I was right, he did need a therapist.
Let's be honest, I've seen a decent amount of dicks in my life and very few of them have been worth all the trouble.
I'm going to tell you a beautiful word.
Fellatio.
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