dude i feel like shit
well u did eat a lot of play-doh
look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
I'm not even planning on drinking that much tonight.. but I'm writing "emergency contact number" and your number on my hand just in case
Dude, I just saw a sixteen year old girl in a catholic school uniform buying a pregnancy test... With a coupon!
No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
She called me Jeff during sex, I just kept going like nothing happened. To think, if I was a woman that would be a problem.
I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
I hooked up with a 20 year old last night. I feel like a hocus pocus witch that sucked life from a child.
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
Yeah I just don't know how I feel about my fuck buddy coming to work at my dads office with me.
Am I a bad person for getting my ex to DD me and a random hookup home last night?
I threw up off of your balcony and it must have been loud because the dog downstairs went insane.
I have no inclination to even want to think about what God's existential meltdown is going to be like. O.o
I got with him in my watermelon costume so ya you owe me $1
sorry for any reference made toward your boobs or making you feel pregnant or incapable of peeing. make it a wonderful day.
Randomize
