Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
My balls are so social today.
I Never golf you the sypdu of andrew. The one o will marry. The one j plwgded my last breath up. The one I pledged everything I live forbworh to. I love him more than life itself
I wish you would always start your sentences with "speaking of my clit..."
But it's not about our feelings, it's about making the men we sleep with feel awful about their lives
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
Yes, you can 69 in a fiat. But I think I have permanent nerve damage
I feel a five day drunk coming on.
So apparently the only parts of last night I remember didn't actually happen.. When did vodka become a hallucinogen?
He kept telling me that it stood for Sex Utility Vehicle
You let someone poor beer into my mouth off of a balcony. Best friend test failed.
Hold on, I'm taking nudes in a blanket fort right now
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
I'd send you a picture as proof but I want to marry him some day and that would be a deal breaker.