my boyfriend just said he'd go down on me if I gave him my password to facebook
I gave her a mint afterward. It felt like giving turndown service at Hotel BJ.
I just shaved my vag with a razor my dad left when he was here a few months ago. Too hungover to think about the Freudian connotations
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My mom ate salad out of the vodka bowl
So we reenacted men's olympic skeet shooting using roman candles and flattened beer cans. That's all
Do you know how to get blood out of tile grout?
I would rather you cheat on me then you watch this season of Breaking Bad without me.
I accidentally called my professor daddy...and I think he liked it. Help, I'm scared.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Currently at a bar observing the mating patterns of drunken people in their 60s. This is hilariously terrifying. Hope he has Viagra.
THIS IS EXACTLY WHY YOU SHOULDA FUCKED BEFORE YOU MADE HIM YOUR BOYFRIEND, CURVED DICKS ARE NOT OK
I just unmatched him. If your Thirsty Thursday only consists on the gym then I am not the woman for you ✌🏻️
I also tried to hide a bottle of vodka in a build a bear last night so that something that happened in my life
There's a bull to ride and dancing on the bar is encouraged. This is my heaven. And this is why god made leopard tube tops.
She was cute in her own little way. Shit, free taco's makes anyone hot.
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