Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
How'd it feel making her break her religion?
this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
my brother is so whacked out on percocet from hurting his legs that he started crying because his belly button was so cute
u ever jackoff with ur legs spread and pretend ur fuckin urself as a girl and get mad u'll never know what that feels like. Or to fly like a bird?
Did u absorb a fraternal twin in the womb?
he was chasing shots of soco with fistfuls of my birthday cake
if women knew the size of my dick, theyd be much more receptive to my sloppy drunken advances
do you know what somber means? it's kinda the opposite of a kegstand
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
I told him i wanted to be exclusively cheating with him
You kept me hostage in your driveway until you got your point across that alaska has warm weather
Pre-chapter meeting quote: "Why is there a bun literally taped to the shelf? That doesn't even make sense when you're drunk, who does that?"
i put frozen meatballs in my drink thinking they were ice cubes and I'm vegetarian wtf
He just chose domino's over sex. ARE YOU KIDDING ME?
Is it bad that we left the kid passed out on the bus? I think his name was texas. I was too drunk to be questioning this.
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