one two three fourrrrnication!
he shaved USA in his pubs
I smelled my fingers after she left and they smelt like sugar cookies. I want that one again.
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
he was wearing ninja turtle pajamas and he STILL got laid. who the fuck is this guy?!
You know its good night when theres makeup smears on the toilet seat
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
Being with her was like shitty sexual fear factor big ass sausage nipples over sized outty belly button i was scared and drunk tell know one
He said he wanted to "superfuck" me
Does he wear a cape??
WHY IS IT FROWNED UPON THE DRESS UP IN CAT COSTUMES AND SIT OUTSIDE OF BARS WITH A BOX OF WINE I THOUGHT THIS WAS AMERICA
Great. I broke up with him before he could like my selfie, now I'm down a like.
I apologize that you just fell victim to my random thought of how to make a blow job come to life via emojis.
Hey you're my best friend, I'm sorry I picked my vagina over my heart last night.
I just delete my bank app from my phone to have enough storage to download tindr. Is this my life now?
I want you inside me. Finish your papers.
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