the best part about tonight...knowing when i wake up in the morning his car will still be full of packing peanuts..and mine wont
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
Don't judge me. It was less weird than it sounds when we were in the moment and it was his birthday
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
ugh... I can't wait for campus to get back. Then everyone will have other things to try to have sex with besides me.
FYI If I die in my sleep it is because I drank a bottle of coke from 1986. I needed a mixer
I had her number in my wallet, I was sitting on a winning ticket for the blowjob lottery and didn't know
That is the best grammar in a dirty text ever. Excellent use of the semi-colon. And yes; I am hard.
I just made SCOTCHSICLES. no further info is necessary
Yo, I totally had forgotten you were CA. Thank you for making my life easier with modern medicine.
We'll get you some ice cream, but no sprinkles. Sprinkles are for winners.
i survived drinking for 24 hours, an 8 ball of cocaine and a threesome. I think you can handle moving.
She was giving me head, and a cop pulled up next to us. I freaked when he looked over at me, but so did he and rear ended the car in front of him.
Randomize
