3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
he wanted me to dress up like someone from lord of the rings. I dumped him.
whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
so when I got there he was dressed as jesus in a recliner drinking whiskey out of the bottle watching spanish porn. Then kept shouting dont judge me or ill judge you. we didn't even go to a halloween party.
Guess who is high enough to buy Jingle All The Way?
I want to fuck you on the side of the bed tonight.
babe, don't say it like that!
I'm sorry, I want to penetrate you on the edge of our sleeping quarters this evening.
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
I told them I was gay and asked them to pass the pie. I ruined pumpkin pie for grandpa.
You shouted "FUCK SHANIA TWAIN" and then downed an Aquafina bottle of white wine none of us knew how to react
i'm almost positive she was a dude but like it doesn't even matter
re read what you just said
You were so calm and collected as you strolled out the door with 40 mcdonalds cups in your arms. It was legendary.
Idk I'm sorry it's weird to ask for testimonials on your penis
Remember when we got high off our ass and you talked me into running in place then punched me in the face and said it was a wall?
Ya, you were bleeding for an hour and a half
I can't dude. Last time I was there, I blew the bartender in the bathroom at last call.
I will warn you that there is a pic of me riding a buffalo....and for the record, I was completely sober!!
Randomize
