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  • that is why this weekend, i will be drinking boxed wine from diet coke cans!!!

    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 15, 09 at 4:37pm
  • It isn't about pedophilia, it's a metaphor

    Submitted by infamouskai on Mar 30, 10 at 1:54am
  • 4:38 FTW, in a perfect world, Sunny would replace the tarded-ass twilight references.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 15, 09 at 6:23pm
  • but why do we never play nightcrawlers anymore?

    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 15, 09 at 5:10pm
  • You better be ready to crash some weddings. It's gonna be a good episode tonight.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 15, 09 at 4:37pm
  • Wow I love sunny in Philadelphia and dog penis that guy knows us all too well

    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 18, 09 at 11:57am
  • You gotta pay the troll toll to get into this boys soul!

    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 17, 09 at 2:19am
  • nobody writes a musical for no reason

    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 16, 09 at 10:38pm
  • Guerilla marketing at it's best.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 15, 09 at 5:58pm
  • I can live w/o a girl who wants to feel like a Cobb salad, however. But I'd bang poor desperate Sweet Dee in a hot minute. The alcoholic waitress too!

    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 16, 09 at 2:38am
  • Night man sneaky and mean

    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 15, 09 at 9:51pm
  • we're crab people now

    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 15, 09 at 8:02pm
  • i know a gale the snail. and i will throw salt all over her by the end of the week.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 15, 09 at 4:42pm
  • He's so far in the closet he's in Narnia

    Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 21, 09 at 10:43am
  • Dayman ahhhahhh fighter of the nightman ahhhahhh champion of the sun!! Whoever text this would you be my new BFF? You can be the brains and the brawn I wanna be the wild card :)

    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 15, 09 at 6:07pm
  • makes for a good weekend

    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 15, 09 at 4:33pm
  • First... From the top

    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 15, 09 at 8:17pm
  • Remember to pop that shirt off

    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 15, 09 at 4:54pm
  • This is the best text ever produced on this site

    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 15, 09 at 4:38pm
  • i eat stickers all the time

    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 17, 09 at 12:10am
  • I'm a phal...full on rapist. Africans, dyslexics, children, that sort of thing.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 15, 09 at 10:28pm
  • charlie we can play night crawlers

    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 15, 09 at 5:19pm
  • what if they take it in the face?........in the face!

    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 15, 09 at 4:35pm
  • im a full on rapist!!! lmao and ya there will be pics from the diet coke canned wine weekend don't worry

    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 15, 09 at 10:28pm
  • Oh shit. Look at that door dude. See that door right there? That door marked 'Pirate'? You think a pirate lives in there?

    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 15, 09 at 5:59pm
  • Charlie, Dennis, and Mac are my boyssss.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 15, 09 at 8:32pm
  • Fightin Phils dominate LA!

    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 16, 09 at 12:31am
  • It puts the penis in it's mouth

    Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 24, 09 at 10:09pm
  • Wild card, BITCHES!!!!!

    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 16, 09 at 12:04am
  • Best show ever -greenman

    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 15, 09 at 10:13pm
  • I don't see a door marked 'Pirate'. I see a door marked 'Private'

    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 15, 09 at 6:04pm
  • My friends threw salt all over me this week, calling me gail the snail.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 15, 09 at 10:45pm
  • Hahahaha dude that's awesome!

    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 15, 09 at 4:42pm
  • So you will be blowing dead dogs this weekend?

    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 15, 09 at 7:41pm
  • best idea i have ever heard!!!

    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 15, 09 at 6:54pm
  • 100% Concur. Best text ever. Hands down.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 15, 09 at 5:53pm
  • i wanna party with you

    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 15, 09 at 5:45pm
  • Pro Tip: Just because it's legal to marry your second cousin, doesn't mean you should.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 21, 09 at 1:55pm
  • jesus how much cheese did you eat man?

    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 16, 09 at 4:20pm
  • lol best f***ing show ever

    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 15, 09 at 6:55pm
  • 563 FTW!! i loooove that show its too hilarious.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 15, 09 at 4:35pm
  • Anyone who likes sunny in Philadelphia blows dead dogs period

    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 17, 09 at 7:35pm
  • So you follwed me all the way home? Yep. And you saw me eat that hot-pocket out of the trash can? yep. Any thoughts on that? nope, Charlie perfect.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 15, 09 at 6:30pm
  • This show isn't about pretzels...

    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 16, 09 at 3:27am
  • my friends and I definitely drank franzia from diet coke cans this weekend... gotta love it!

    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 19, 09 at 8:15pm
  • There isn't enough salt in the world for her.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 15, 09 at 9:42pm
  • Remember to to post pics of said weekend!!!!

    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 15, 09 at 6:28pm
  • They must be high all the damn time to do the shit they do. LOVE that show.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 15, 09 at 4:34pm
  • I enjoy the cleavland steamer as well

    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 18, 09 at 4:06pm
  • You're my hero. Intervention!

    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 15, 09 at 11:31pm
  • I guess last weekend I should have crashed a funeral with super soakers, canned wine, and a drunk, old fat guy with weed. Damn.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 15, 09 at 11:27pm
  • When did I put on greenman?

    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 15, 09 at 8:28pm
  • I AM THE NIGHTMAN!!!!!

    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 15, 09 at 5:15pm
  • We had a wine-in-a-can party last Friday!!!

    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 15, 09 at 7:15pm
  • May I point out a musical about pedophilia is not funny Danny devito not withstanding

    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 19, 09 at 9:30pm
  • i need to know who in the 563 wrote this....

    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 16, 09 at 1:42am
  • That episode about the toll troll was ridiculously hilarious! The show itself is insane and I am hooked!!

    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 17, 09 at 11:15am
  • Hahaha i'm still laughing at this. Finally a good text That show is hilarious

    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 15, 09 at 5:52pm
  • looks like I'll be having a milksteak this weekend then

    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 16, 09 at 12:28am
  • Any dog semen in there?

    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 19, 09 at 9:25pm
  • If you like sunny in Philadelphia FUCK YOU

    Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 26, 09 at 6:42pm
  • Best show of all time!

    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 15, 09 at 7:12pm
  • Last friday I drank andre spumante out of a root beer can. It was awesome

    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 16, 09 at 12:35am
  •  if you like this in your ass you like this show

    Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 5, 09 at 7:33pm
  • Today, I thought it would be funny to fart in my roommates mouth while he was asleep. I walked over to him and pulled my pyjamas down and let loose. To my surprise it was a very wet one and I accidently took a dump on his face, he woke up and beat me until I was bleeding. FML

    Submitted by Anonymous on Dec 4, 09 at 7:33am
  • that was my text i guess....sorry i party.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 15, 09 at 11:37pm
  • When your friends threw salt all over you they should have called you "Edsel the PRETZEL"

    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 15, 09 at 10:56pm
  • So would you be in a Wendy's bathroom with bacon bits and old-fashioned hamburgers right about now?

    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 17, 09 at 1:05am
  • Milk steak and jelly beans

    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 16, 09 at 1:00pm
  • that was the best intervention ever

    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 15, 09 at 6:11pm
  • My friend and I did wine in a can last Saturday. We were making violent hand guestures with our cans. It was great.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 15, 09 at 8:46pm
  • charlie: "whats in the jar? what is in that jar?" episode where charlie and frank are tripping at eagles tryouts

    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 15, 09 at 6:48pm