he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
my math teacher staples burger king applications to failed tests
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
I slept with some guy because he drew a dinosaur on my arm
This girl told me she was a virgin the other day. I felt like I was talking to a unicorn.
then mid-sex he looked at me and said "i hope this is as good for you as it is for me" and kept going.
Every time I remember you're bi, the world gets a little brighter.
If you can get laid in a rudolph onesie you are doing something right my friend.
It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving
If I don't have the money by then, I'll pay you in sex.
It's going to be 23.5 times of sex and 19 blow jobs. I just googled it.
That's what he gets for shittin at the strip club. Who does that??
I know this is super early in advance but can I borrow your horse mask on 4/20
The neighbors ahemed the WHOLE time. Their kids are the ones that scream loud enough for me to remember my birth control. It's payback!
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