My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
1 of the best things of being a business owner is I don't get fired for having sex in the office
He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
Did we fight the bathroom girl ? She just wanted to give us lotion and condoms.
At least you have booty calls.
True. I just waste them though. I feel like I need to be told "there are people in this world who would give anything for just one and you have two." You know in that same tone your parents told you about the starving people in china
Its a first. Never been peed on in a line to concert. First time for everything.
She kept telling me it was a squirtgun.
CUT OFF ALL YOUR HAIR COME ON MAN LET'S DO THIS
Well, I guess my plans of staying around the apartment and drinking my weight in boxed wine are ruined. I have a date tonight.
I'm driving to his house to eat chicken and hopefully have an orgasm
Look, he's a hot korean guy with a motorcycle and a great ass. I'm gonna do head-titingly kinky shit with him.
who knew rolling through the dorm on a scooter in footie pajamas would attract so many guys. he said i'm his soulmate.
Ok here's the plan: birth control, KFC, handcuffs.
She could hold her breath for a long time. Best underwater blowjob ever.
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